Memorial website in the memory of your loved one

Why do I need to do this? I feel emptiness, apart from missing my Father so much, I have a desire and passion to heal, I can’t change the world I can only do a bit and move on. I want to humble myself, I want to share and encourage, I want to help if I can, I want to give hope, everybody deserves a chance over and over again, its not how many times you fall, but how many times you stand up and be counted.

These were the policies of my father, these are the things my father taught me by me just watching him deal with people, these are the things he silently taught me. It saddens my heart so much that I lost my dad at the age of 20, some might say “ how about those that lost theirs at a younger age”, I know and I understand its tougher when you lose someone at a much younger age, but I was just blossoming and I needed direction, I had grown up before my time already and my dad was the only one who understood me, the time I spent with him at the hospital at the time of his illness drew both of us closer, he has always given me what I wanted, he has never denied me anything in my life, he spoilt me so much he treated me like an “egg that must not break” he shielded me from a lot of things his most concern is to keep me happy all the time, so when he fell ill I slept on the floor beside his bed everyday till he went into a coma and could not see or talk to me anymore.

I stayed by his bed in intensive care and talked to him, I begged him not to die I promised I will always take care of him even if he cannot walk, talk or move, I just wanted him alive at all cost he kept on moving his head from side to side and I feel he was saying something to me. I have been there the night before till the next morning and I just dashed home for a change of clothes and by the time I came back he was no more. I love my dad so much; just looking at your pictures makes me cry so much I just wish you could see me now, your little girl finally grown up with kids and responsibilities. I wish I could talk to you about my job, how I love to do what I do, you know, discuss with you on how the world has changed from your time, talk to you about new technologies and how you can you can detect an electrical fault by installing a diagnostic software that tells you what the fault is and recommend a fix as well rather than you having to trace the cable manually. Oh so much has changed, so many things we have in common now that I just really wish you were here.

Daddy, this is to you, I will forever cherish the time I spent beside you in hospital, even when you came home I was still sleeping on the floor beside your bed, your illness gave me a reality check, it made me realise that nothing last forever, whatever impact or contribution you can do, do it and do it well, even if I die poor I want to be remembered for good things, I want to be talked about in a good way, I want my children to be ambassadors of goodness. Watching you everyday, from coming into my mum’s room every morning to say good morning to her, from checking on us every night before you go to sleep yourself, from you standing on the balcony in the middle of the night nearly everyday and I just wondered what you think about when you stand there every night, when you died your shadow remained permanently anytime I look up there I see you standing there watching, watching everybody from afar.

To everyone let us start to make an impact, let us be good fathers and mothers to our children, not just with material things but our way of life as well, Children watch our moves, our words, our relationship with people, please join me in making this dream a reality. How do you want to impact?

You will forever be alive in me. I love you Daddy.

Tributes and Condolences
Beautiful Story   / Donna Mother Of Christina Ann Valle
Your story about your dad is beautiful.  I take care of my 82 year old mother and my grandson that was from my daughter who died in 2005.  It is so true that life is so short and if were not careful it will pass us by.  I like that son...  Continue >>
very proud   / Taiwo Olateju
Bisoye is extremely proud of her dad and can't stop talking about him. This had made some of  us (Bisoye's friend ) to pay our tribute and pray that the chief rest in peace. In fact with Bisoye working hard to make the chief's memory linger...  Continue >>
Condolences  / Nikki Wagner
I just lost my Dad in July from a heart attack. He had just turned 51 5 days before he passed away. I am 25 and I am pregnant with my 2nd child. He got to meet my 1st son and I have pictures and video with them together, but I wish more than anything...  Continue >>
My deepest condolences   / Hendrick Polanco
My deepest condolences.  May these few word from the Holy Scriptures bring you comfort... John 11:32-45 32 And so Mary, when she arrived where Jesus was and caught sight of him, fell at his feet, saying to him: “Lord, if you had been her...  Continue >>
RICARDO still remembers sitting with his wife, Maria, in the doctor's waiting room. * Neither of them had the courage to read the results of Maria's latest medical examinations. Then, Ricardo opened the envelope, and they hastily glanced over the med...  Continue >>
My deepest condolences  / Hendrick Polanco     Read >>
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His legacy


Tribute to my father

My Father the Great

My Father is not easy to describe, I remember his robe of many colours and I remember his long Gold chain that touches the ground. I remember is long warrior cap with thistles at the tip of it. I remember his various walking sticks of different shapes and sizes, his name and title written on top of his shoes, his title is written round his cap, his rings bear his initials.

My Father the great, he wakes up to the sound of drumming with a feast awaiting him. For every tear in my eye, a feast of chicken stew is made especially for me. For every pain I feel, a celebration is held to celebrate my recovery. For every tear in my cloth a new wardrobe is specially created just for me. My father the great how can I ever forget you.

My father the great describes me as a special person, he said my birth brought him fame and money, he said he named me to commemorate and celebrate the honour his kinsmen bestowed on him, he said anytime he hears someone call my name, he feels so honoured and special, so am very special too, yet I have never given him anything, how come he made me so special Oh! My father the great how I miss you so!

On New years eve we dance into your room from church with songs of praise to say happy New year to you, you pray for everyone of us, you sing with us. Come morning 3 sets of kings drummers arrive to drum and celebrate the New year with my Father, we sit down to eat New years dinner and sway on our sit to the sound of the drummers ode to my father. Ah! My father the great how can I repay you! 

You preside over the morning feast and look down on us with so much love and tenderness, you are ready to forgive and forget all our shortcomings for the whole year and give us another chance to make amends, even in death you still stayed around for 40 days to grant our wishes. Oh! Oh! Oh! My father the great New Year has never been the same since you’ve gone, the drummers have ceased to drum with joy, the sound that comes from their drum is so sorrowful that we all start to cry and your wife cannot just bear it any more and I your special baby can also not bear it anymore, so I decided to go on a long journey hoping to find the love and care like yours, but I have come to realise that no love can ever be equal to the one you gave me, you are one of a kind and I think you only come round once, please when you come back pick me again as your special daughter.

I remember once, my mother went on holiday and one of us fell ill, you told us we were going to our hometown to spend the weekend with you, and we found ourselves at the airport enroute to London to meet our mother. My father the great full of surprises and kind thoughts.

My best friend became your daughter, you treated my best friend the way you treat me, whatever I have my best friend had, through your loving kindness and compassion my best friend family became our family, my best friend is Muslim, yet come Muslim celebration time, no one knows the difference between us. You allowed me share her life, her world, you exposed me to the other side of life that I would ordinarily not know anything about in a very gentle and compassionate way, you made me see myself through my best friends eyes, though I was too young to notice, so I took it for granted. But thank you father, am a better person for it as I grow older I can now see what you saw then and why.